Well, I had my review today. David, Boaz and Myles were on my panel. It didn’t go as well as I would have like. They liked my concept and character but didn’t think the story was working. I was told that he shouldn’t get the phone call, it’s to unrealistic, to have someone call for help or have him listen to a police scanner. I also need a bigger ender. I should also establish the characters relationship better. As well as, play with the comedy. Some didn’t like that I gave him the stretch ability.
Some suggestions I got:
Maybe Nigel misunderstands the scanner and they really don’t heed help, but he thinks they do.
Maybe the dog doesn’t want to help Nigel with his heroic adventure and has the attitude, here we go again. The dog knows that he can't save the day anymore.
Maybe end it screen to black and can still here the two arguing.
Maybe the dog is the real superhero.
So I’ll watch some Looney toon shorts and shows about superheroes this weekend and then try to rework the story. I’ll meet with some of these professors this coming week and see if they approve of what I’m working on. We’ll at least they liked my characters so I can start to model them this weekend.